Program will give a little care to the caregivers

Bea Field and Ruth Stafford know firsthand about caring for a spouse in declining health and the personal toll it can take.

That’s why the women, both members of the Laguna Beach Seniors board, are launching Caregiving for the Caregiver, a support program for unpaid caretakers.

Beginning Wednesday, the Laguna Beach Community & Susi Q Center will offer a free semimonthly drop-in support group for people who are caring for a loved one or friend.

A hotline for caregivers in need of advice or a listening ear has already been set up. Within 24 hours of placing a call, a trained volunteer will get in touch with the caregiver.

Services are meant to address an issue that Field said will only grow with the aging population of baby boomers.

An estimated 44 million Americans 18 and older provide unpaid assistance and support to older people and adults with disabilities, according to the Family Caregiver Alliance, a nonprofit founded in the 1970s to address the needs of people providing long-term care for loved ones at home.

For five years, Field, 81, tended to her husband, George, who suffered from Parkinson’s disease, until he died in 2007. Field didn’t have any medical experience but was thrust into the role of tending to George’s every need, which meant keeping track of 17 medications at one point.

“The problem was George never slept,” Field said. “He would doze during the day but at night didn’t sleep. I eventually hired someone to watch [George] at night. He would become agitated.

“You are caring for someone you are extremely emotionally involved with, and sometimes they are not happy with you. Life has suddenly gone from a much broader focus and perspective into four walls of that house.”

The emotional, physical and mental toll of taking care of a loved one in declining health can produce “intense” stress with feelings of isolation, Field said.

Everyday tasks such as going to the grocery story become nearly impossible because the person can’t be left alone, she added.

Estimates show that 40% to 70% of caregivers have clinically significant symptoms of depression, with about one quarter to one half of these caregivers meeting the diagnostic criteria for major depression, according to the Family Caregiver Alliance.

“We hope that caregivers pick up the phone and ask questions such as, ‘How did you handle this situation?’” Field said.

Stafford, 79, said she is caring for her 86-year-old husband, Pat, who has dementia.

Twice Pat has fallen and Stafford, a clinical psychologist and Laguna Beach resident, needed help from a neighbor to lift him up.

She has had to learn to refrain from asking the question, “Don’t you remember?” She has also transitioned into being the primary decision-maker and handling all the finances.

Both women said they pray for patience and understanding.

“I need to slow down [when speaking to Pat] and look right in his eyes,” Stafford said. “When I talk fast, he can’t handle it at all.”

The issue of caregiver support has also caught the attention of Assemblywoman Cheryl Brown (D-San Bernardino).

Brown wants to create a privately funded task force to make recommendations for improving the state’s caregiver support services and is crafting a resolution, according to a story on the AARP website.

“We know what some of the issues and answers are, but we need those people in the trenches to say, ‘This is the solution,’” Brown said in the story.

Rita McCabe, a licensed marriage and family therapist, will facilitate the semimonthly group meetings at the Susi Q, Stafford said. Stafford will lead training for phone volunteers.

“The idea is people who have been through [caregiving] are helping other people,” she said.

Caregivers in need of someone to speak with can call (949) 715-8105 from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Mondays through Fridays. The support group meets the second and fourth Wednesday of each month from 3 to 4:30 p.m. at the Susi Q, 380 Third St.

To become a volunteer, register with Laguna Beach Seniors by calling (949) 497-2441.

Volunteers are asked to make an initial six-month commitment and attend occasional meetings with other volunteers.