Please, Kamala, give us something to believe in

July 23, 2024 3 AM PT

Hello and happy Tuesday. There are 104 days until the election and today I fell out of a coconut tree and landed on Kamala Harris.

What the heck?

So apparently, as Harris would say, we are moving forward “unburdened by what has been.”

And by that I mean Joe.

There, I did it — both of Harris’ catchphrases out of the way.

But get ready, because you are going to be inundated with coconuts and confusion until the ballots are counted, making palm tree dangers the least of our concerns.

Here’s the real question: We’ve spent four years with voters hating on Harris and now she has less than four months to turn it around. It requires a leap of faith that we the people really will be unburdened by the past.

Can we do it?

And bonus content: Musk, Clooney and the J.D. Vance problem.

Race, misogyny and awkwardness

I spent some time in Milwaukee recently for the Republican National Convention. While I was there, I asked some Black voters what they thought of Harris.

One woman summed up what much of America is worried about, if not saying out loud: “I still don’t think there will ever be a lady president,” Lisa Collins told me.

And Lisa has a point — just ask Hillary.

Then there’s the fact that Harris is mixed race Black and South Asian. There’s a lot of reason to believe that the current far-right upsurge, full of racism thinly veiled by the hazy sentimentality of “Western culture,” is a backlash to the presidency of Barack Obama.

So there’s a certain segment of the population, that while they may not admit it, will never vote for a woman of color — and this includes a bunch of swing voters in key states.

Harris has more to overcome than just misogyny and racism, though. Because folks, she is awkward in a crowd.

I’ve never met her, and plenty of people have told me one-on-one she’s great.

But the tepidness many are feeling toward this candidate switch-out is that Harris has yet to inspire. What are we really getting in terms of likability? Joe may be struggling, but he’s a popular fellow with his ice-cream eating and Dark Brandon humor.

That’s the challenge for Harris and for us — she just needs to say like three things we are all for (reproductive rights? sane immigration policy that doesn’t destroy families? healthcare we can afford?) without making us cringe about coconuts.

Her first public comments since taking over the top slot give me hope.

But please, Kamala, give us something to believe in.

OK, George. Now what?

So we all remember the devastating letter from George Clooney about how he saw Joe at that huge Hollywood fundraiser and could confirm the debate wasn’t just a bad night.

Say what you want, but that letter was a proverbial tipping point. So George and his caviar-dreams crowd have some responsibility here.

Yes, Republicans love to slam on the Hollywood elites. But guess what? Just about everyone else loves a good celebrity endorsement. I mean, all Trump could muster was Kid Rock and Hulk Hogan and that went over bigly at the RNC.

Remember that very short, less-than-four-month period Harris has to whip up some excitement? We’re looking at you, George. You’d better be on the phone with Julia, Oprah and Taylor booking their rally dates.

And if you feel like tearing your shirt off — as Hogan did at the convention — that’s cool too.

Billionaire accountability

Elon Musk has pledged $45 million a month to Trump. Yes, $45 million a month! That’s enough money that Trump has done a big back flip away from his rants against electric cars, instead promising to both “drill baby drill” and support Tesla.

But I digress. The point is it’s one thing to be a weird baby-making-obsessed far-right apologist when Doddering Joe was in the race. It’s quite another to be a weird baby-making obsessed far-right apologist when you are railing against the historic fight for America to elect its first woman of color, someone who is clearly competent and accomplished — which he started to do on his social media site Monday.

Same for you, Mark Zuckerberg.

Zuckerberg has said he isn’t endorsing anyone this election, but called Trump a “badass” after the assassination attempt.

I am not so naive as to believe there is any accountability for billionaires. But I can dream — and watch. Rich folks let you know who they are by how they spend their money.

If Musk continues his $45-million pledge, his values are on display. If Zuckerberg continues to sit this out, his values are on display.

The J.D. Vance problem

Last but no least, the problem with J.D.

Sure, the Yale hillbilly seemed like a genius veep pick when Jumbled Joe was on the ticket. The goal was to a) stroke Big Don’s ego and b) shore up the base with a MAGA man’s man (i.e. white dude who likes guns) destined to carry Christian nationalism into the future.

But now the Republicans may be feeling a twinge of Vance-itis, because swing voters may not be as thrilled with mini-Trump as Trump is. The America of two white men telling women and minorities what they can and can’t do is definitely an approach burdened by the past.

And if Harris picks a nice, white liberal fellow to be her running mate, as almost certainly will happen, the goal will be to give those “gals make sandwiches, not laws” folks a bit of reassurance that there’s a man in the picture, albeit the background. Our as-yet mystery non-threatening pale-male veep will no doubt blanket the swing states in a comforting swaddle of rallies meant to put lady-fears to rest — while reminding everyone else that Vance is the problem, not the solution.